Can Purell be used as lube?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize