Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
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