It's just like the Real World with babies
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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