i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
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she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
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Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I AM VODKA MAN
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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