You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
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