I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
