I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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