Capitaan dildo arrescate!
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Is it penis luge time yet?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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