He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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