If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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