TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
