its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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