Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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