I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
