I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
