i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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