for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
