thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize