My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
