Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
