ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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