she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow