there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
