But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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