Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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