I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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