So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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