I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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