Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Just cropdusted the office
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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