If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
