not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize