You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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