Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
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