Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
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