there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize