dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
