addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
