I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"