So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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