I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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