lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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