i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
