He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
