so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
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drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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