I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
time to smoke my breakfast
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
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I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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