Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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