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• (301): View more from Maryland

  i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c

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• (909): View more from California

  It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity

  (909): View more from California

  Something's gotta give!

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."

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• (916): View more from California

  Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.

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• (516): View more from New York

  I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  My bed smells like the plague

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911

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