did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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