Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
