Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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