mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
