sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
