My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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